Love Is Not Arrogant
Ever wondered what the difference is between arrogance and pride? While pride is a high or inordinate opinion of one's self, arrogance is making claims or pretensions to being superior; overbearingly assuming that it is your job to tell those less superior how they are not measuring up. Arrogant people think that they “know it all.” They think they are right all the time and often shame their spouses into feelings of worthlessness. They think too much of themselves to apologize when they know they have done wrong. So they stonewall, pout, and give the cold-shoulder instead of loving.
Arrogance also depicts an attitude that they know the minds, actions, and motives of their spouses. They make statements such as, “They’ve always been that way, and they always will be, there’s no changing them.” When statements are made like this, you hold your spouse hostage to never being given the grace to change as the Spirit does its work. Husbands and wives should strive not to be “puffed up” but modest, allowing change to occur by the Spirit of God working in their spouse, understanding this is God’s job to change their spouse, and not theirs. A loving husband or wife prays for their spouse and demonstrates godly characteristics in their own life that will demonstrate to their mate the very qualities of Christ. It means, allowing God to do His job of molding us all into Christlikeness while we stay out the way as He works in our spouse's lives.
Growing up, my mother used to say, "if you'd just take care of yourself, you'd have your hands full". Jesus said it like this,
"For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?" Matthew 7:2-4
