Ever had those moments where you felt like it was always about what your spouse wanted and not you? Ever fought to have it your way without consideration of your spouse? I can honestly say that I have been on both sides of this one!
Many marriages have been damaged by the “it’s all about me” attitude. It is an attitude that rules and reigns when husbands and wives focus on themselves and their individual needs. Manipulation of the other is almost always the result. Yet Scripture clearly calls all believers to ministry. As Christians, we often share the love of God with others, but within the walls of our homes, we have lost this passion. We don’t view our marriages as ministry opportunities. Instead we focus on our own neediness and selfish wants. Seeking wholeness apart from God, we manipulate one another in alarming ways to get our needs met.
For the month of February, let’s focus on 1 Corinthians, chapter 13. The love chapter, as it is commonly called, will be our foundational Scripture for love and ministry within marriage. Through the guidance of the Holy Spirit, may manipulation and selfishness be revealed and crucified in your relationship.
Love—we use this word with such carelessness. We love so many things. We love to play sports, we love our cars, our careers, our things. We love certain activities, certain foods, and certain relationships. Our fleshly nature is often driven by our feelings and responses, when in fact love is so much more than a feeling. Love involves commitment, determination, and dedication. It is a choice to love someone. Love is commanded by God, with clear instruction on how we should love and why we should love. In 1 Corinthians 13, God gives us a clear, concise, and detailed description of agape love (unconditional, godly love) as the benchmark of the love husbands and wives can share with one another. Consider these four verses:
“Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous;
love does not brag and is not arrogant,
does not act unbecomingly;
it does not seek its own, is not provoked,
does not take into account a wrong suffered,
does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices
with the truth; bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails.”
—1 Corinthians 13:4–8a
Will you choose to minister love in your marriage, making more "you" choices than "me" choices?
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